It has been suggested (mostly by hung-over post-paloozers) that, in addition to the mere reporting of experiences shared by Morgan and me, this blog might also become a bulletin board for celebrity-style friends gossip. I always do what hung-over post-paloozers tell me. Even buy Lehman Bros. stock, grrr.
ITEM! A certain couple, L___ and B___, whose names rhyme with “Len” and “Biz” have recently found themselves MARRIED OFF…to…EACH OTHER. A certain eagle-eyed observer, present at the ceremony, was reported as saying “There was love in the air. There was love on the ground. There was love all over the pews and sort of dangling from streamers in the rafters. It got all over my #%$@#$ tux.” ITEM! That “eagle-eyed observer” was our cat, Gita, who got her Journalism degree via the internet. ITEM! No, not really. Gita is not allowed to use the internets. ITEM! This past Tuesday, R___ and W___ were seen k___ in a y___ in downtown C___. “It was t___ h___!” said just about everybody. ITEM! Reports have been coming in fast and furious that Colin JT Woods viciously kicked a Playstation 2 machine that, legally, he only owns half of. The Tattler has obtained incontrovertible photographic proof of this event:
PS2 vs. Colin JT Woods: The Trampoline Death Match
Just try and controvert it. Speculation runs rampant as to why Colin may have unleashed the fury of his feet. The case may be, as Tattler regular, Cranky Old Burt, claims: “CJTW couldn’t kick the broadside of a barn if it were living in his pants. I bet the PS2 kicked him and he’s just trying to put a good spin on it.”
ITEM! That’s it for the first volume of the Tattler. Please send along any celebrity friend gossip via IM to Gita’s secret AOL account: i_iz_a_reel_jurnalist_kat. Gita is soooo mid-90’s era.
Oh yeah?? Well I heard that the sheep in cat’s clothing costume Gita used for Halloween came from a cloned sheep. Put that in your plastic bag!
Heather only pretends to differentiate between good wine and swill. Cheap wine will get her drunk and sometimes she acts silly right after or during the drunk part. Expensive wine does the same thing.